Politics - Irish Style

[Culchie]

Some light relief, and the way we look at ourselves.

www.langerland.com

[pacificstar]

Your a brave man..........opening a discussion on the Irish Politics! Good luck on this thread!

[Culchie]

not a discussion, just a joke, lord knows this board could do with a little bit of light hearted sillyness.

[pacificstar]

Yeah we need some humor.....okay you Irish man St Patty's Day is coming up get with the pun's.

[loveu2]

For those who said Croats can't laugh at themselves!!!



1. you're 6'4'', can bench press 325 pounds, shave twice a day, but you still cry when your mum yells at you.
2. You carry your lunch in a Supermarket Produce bag because you can't fit 2 mortadella & mozzarella "sandwiches", 4 oranges, 3 bananas, a jar of olives, last night's sarma (cabbage roll) and a kobasica (Croatian sausage) into a regular paper lunch bag.
3.Your father owns 3 houses, has $300,000 in the bank, but still drives a 1976 Ford.
4. Your mother owns 3 houses, has $400,000 in the bank but still believes she's entitled to the pension.
5. You share one bathroom with your 5 brothers and 7 sisters, have no money, but drive a $75,000 Club Sport.
6. Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant and travel agent are all blood relatives.
7. You consider dunking a pack of Duncan Donuts in coffee a nutritious breakfast.
8. There are at least 30 pairs of papuce (slippers) and shoes in your front hall closet.
9. Your parent believe the cure to all diseases, including AIDS and cancer, is a bit of mast (fat or oil, basically Lard) and rakija (croatian moonshine). One or the other or both at the same time .
10. You live in a 10 square foot bungalow, but still have 2 kitchens.
11. your mamma thinks wearing ankle socks with her slip-on Homeypeds is a good look.
12. Your father's breakfast, lunch and dinner is Jack Daniels and Coke.
13. Your house and furniture is brown in color. Everything
14. When every room in your house has real or fake plants in plant pots.

[loveu2]

You know you're a Dalmatinac/Dalmatinka (dalmatian) when.......
(from the coast of Croatia)
"BEST d**n PLACE IN THE WORLD"......so says SINRAD
1. At least 15 of your cousins live on your street.
2. All 5 of those cousins are named after your grandfather.
3. You still wear see-through dress socks and pointy patent leather dress shoes to weddings.
4. You are married and can still squeeze into your cream white confirmation suit.
5. In some capacity, there is a dump truck or tandem trailer in your life.
6. A high school diploma and 1 year of TAFE college has earned you the title of "professor" among your relatives ("Jebo te....on je pametan. Ovaj je skolovan"). Basically translates to ........"ff**k..... he is smart......he is schooled!
7. You are on a first name basis with at least 10 banquet hall owners and 15
greengrocers.
8. You have at least one relative named "Marijana" or "Ante".(mary or anthony)
9. Every single tape in your car has the dance version of "Nandalina or Veceras Je Nasa Festa." (nadalina and Tonite is our feast)
10. The meat you eat is usually a former pet.
11. It takes 4 disposable blades to shave. (I'm not sure if they are referring to a guy or a girl).
12. If someone in your family is UNDER 5 ft 8", it is presumed your mother had an affair.
13. There are more than 28 people in your bridal party.
14. You netted more than $50,000 on your first communion.
15. Your father lives in a subdivision and still raises his own chickens, sheep, goat and rabbits.
16. At some point in your life, you were a D.J or mowed the lawns at your uncle's.
17. You can name more people in the Vjesnik obituaries than players on the Italia soccer Team.
18. 30 years after immigrating, your parents still say "Molim" when answering the phone. (croatian for Hello, who is it?_
19. You and your wife/husband have matching beanies for those cold winter mornings.
20. You are offended when the wedding you attend serves less than 9 courses
despite the fact that you don't eat half of it.
21. You ask "How much for cash?" when buying but will accept 'gifts' in exchange for cash when selling.
22. You ask forcefully what discount you will get or specify the discount yourself if you pay up front "Cash in hand" (C'mon $20 cash in hand, for a $100 item).
23. You are not materialistic but insist a $500 wedding present is nothing.
24. You think having a concrete backyard is is for Hercegovci.
25. You think a big fountain in the front yard next to the veggie patch is tasteful.
26. You actually believe everyone eats those sugared almonds in the bomboniere at your wedding.
27. You always have a friend who 'owes you a favour'.
28. Dalmatian Weddings involve your parents making fun of "token" hercegovci at the wedding, wearing white the socks with the 3 color stripe under their suits.
29. Card games involve some great curses ("Za jarca boga tovara!) -- (from the balls of God's donkey), and grumblings about the f**ken muslim/bosanac ref who gave Red Star the 97th minute penalty versus Hajduk back in 1961.
30.You eat, breathe, , piss, sleep, live; "SOCCER!!!!!!!!" EXCEPT if you are from Zadar.....and then it is KOSARKA! (basketball)

[Observer]

I love it!

[Valleycat]

I saw this all long ago. . but it was about Italians. . just modified for this use?. .. lol. . still funny

[Shannon]

That's funny Valleycat...I saw this twice before too! Once for Canadians and once for Korea when I lived there!
They're always funny though, even if a lot of them are so similar

...and they, those almonds are a tradition where I'm from too! We always ate them!!......lol

[Loveu2]

I have more if you want to see them. All about Croatians!!!!




LoveU2

[Valleycat]

The point being. . hey people. . we are all alike!!

So why don't you all just get over it. . . and deal with it.

The only difference between people. . is that there are good people in this world and there are bad people in this world.

Which are you??

Stop all this bickering .

Some of you are sure using a lot of energy, time, hot air on such stupid issues. Why don’t you put it to better use. . . like improve this world.

Good God. . . enough already.